This is nothing special, well to you anyway. I'm not a scrapbook type, or a baby book writer, or even a picture printer. I'm terrible at recording memories. This blog is my attempt at holding on to some of my life as a Christian, a wife, and a homeschooling Mom of 5. I am a country girl that lived in a big city for 14 years, and moved to the Deep South for quiet, quaint, small town living.

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Rough Day/Week/um... Summer.

This summer has not been typical in any sense.  It all started with Troy's cancer diagnosis.  Surgery, recovery, treatment planning with all the doctor appointments, scans, tests, actual chemotherapy and the scheduling mess that it makes.... And I'm not even getting into the emotional toll it can take on a person. 

We found out on Father's day we were expecting a 5th child in February.  This was the best news we could have received in such a stressful time.  An answer to a prayer, a sign of Hope!  It was all pretty amazing since he had a testicle removed in May, I was still breast feeding at the time, and there was only a 2 week window of opportunity before he started chemo.

It was so hard to not tell our friends and family, but it was early. 

Monday, as I sat with Troy during his treatment I started bleeding.  I fought tears and prayed.  We waited until his treatment was over, and with the help of sweet friends watching our children, we went to the hospital.  The miscarriage was confirmed after a lot of tests and Tuesday I had a D&C.

Sadly, this post is taking place where Ginnie's birthday (yesterday), and Livia's birthday (today) should be.  Our incredible friends have completely stepped up in that department and are making these days special for the girls.  I am over whelmed and cry every time I think of how sweet they are.  In fact, I'm crying a lot.  I wanted this baby before we even knew he or she was there. 

It is hard to feel so devestated, yet know there is hope.  I can't believe it is natural to feel both ways at once.  It can only come from a God who is over all things natural and supernatural.  There is a God big enough to use each trial for more than I can understand. 

We are trusting and holding on to the Lord, praying that he will use us even now, especially now.


  1. I'm so sorry to hear this. Sending you prayers and healing.

  2. I'm praying for you, Troy, and your entire family during this amazingly difficult time. I can't imagine what you must be going through! It's so great that you have such great faith to help you get through all of this.- Sarah Schultz

  3. Oh Janie...I am so sorry and so sad for you all. I'm so glad you have good friends around you to help keep the moving parts oiled...and will pray that the Lord will continue to provide balm for those tender, hurting places in your heart.

  4. Hi Janie, my heart is sad for you. You have been & will continue to be in my prayers. I've been reading Ps 91 a lot lately & will pray that for your family. Love & hugs, Sarah

  5. Janie and Troy, My heart goes out to you both. You have been through and are going through so much, but this I know - that God is all sufficient and in control even during times like these. There are so many things we don't understand, but we must trust HIM. May God be so close to you and your family. You are in our prayers. Debbie Knefel

  6. Kristen WilliamsJuly 29, 2011 at 6:51 AM and your family are in my prayers. My heart goes out to you and I pray God gives you the strength you need to get through this!