That Crazy Night

The Best Kid Movie Ever!

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Agnes: Why are you wearing your pajamas?
Vector: They're not pajamas! It's my warm-up suit.
Agnes: Why do you need warming up for?
Vector: For doing stuff.
Margo: What kind of stuff?
Vector: Super-cool stuff you wouldn't understand.
Agnes: Like sleeping?

Gru: Clearly we need to set a few rules. Rule number one: You will not touch anything.
Margo: Aha. What about the floor?
Gru: Yes, you may touch the floor
Margo: What about the air?
Gru: Yes, you may touch the air.
Edith: What about this?
[Holds a ray gun on her hands, the laser sight aimed right at Gru]
Gru: Ah! Where did you get that?
Edith: Found it.
[Gru takes it away from her]
Gru: Rule number two: You will not bother me while I'm working. Rule number three: You will not cry, or whine, or laugh, or giggle, or sneeze or barf or fart! So no, no, no annoying sounds. All right?
Agnes: Does this count as annoying?
[puckles her cheeks]
Gru: [Stops her] Very! 

Agnes: I like him. He's nice.
Edith: He's scary.
Agnes: Like Santa.

I'm applying for a villain loan.
I go by Vector.
It's a mathematical term, represented by an arrow with both direction and magnitude.
Vector!
That's me, because I commit crimes with both direction and magnituide.
Oh yeah!

When we got adopted by a bald guy, I thought this'd be more like Annie.

Unicorns, I love them. Unicorns, I love them. Uni uni unicorns, I love them. Uni unicorns, I could pet one if they were really real. And they are! So I bought one so I could pet it. Now it loves me, now I love it. La lala la la...

Agnes: Aw. My caterpillar never turned into a butterfly.
Edith: That's a Cheeto.
Agnes: Oh.

Margo: Hello? Is anyone in?
Gru: Go away, I'm not home!
Margo: Yes you are. I just heard you.
Gru: No, you didn't. This... This is a recording.
Margo: No it isn't.
Gru: Yes it is. Listen. Please leave a message after the tone. Beep!
[Edith kicks door, Gru screams in pain]
Agnes: Goodbye, recorded message.

Edith: It was your cousin's idea!
Dave the Minion: *What*?

Agnes: Pinkie promise?
Gru: Oh yes, my pinkie promises.

 It's like my heart is a tooth, and it's got a cavity that can only be filled with children.

 I will Stuff YOU ALL in the Crust!

Agnes: Will you read us a bedtime story?
Gru: No.
Agnes: Pretty please?
Gru: The physical appearance of the please makes no difference.